Chandni Chowk to China - Movie Review

It is official now. Nikhil Advani just can't deliver without K.Jo. First there was salaam-e-ishq which was somewhat bearable, and now this, a totally unbearable - excess masala movie, one can not digest it.

CC2C is a story about an underdog [yawn...] a loser Sidhu [Akshay] who lives in chandni chowk, finding his destiny in lines of his hands and in babas, sadhus and all. Until one day two chinese men finds out him and tell him that he is reincarnation of their legendary fighter Leau Shang. And he must save their village now from evil HoJo [Gordon Liu] So our hero gets ready to go with them along with his Guruji [Ranvir Shoury - under used] living back in India, his dada [Mithun]. And adventure begins [!!!].

Sounds familier?? Me too. During whole movie, I was digging in my mind, which movie I have seen, contained same storyline? Was it 'Road to El Dorado'?? Or some dash of 'Chronicles of Narnia'? Somewhere I have seen this, a loser become hero and everyone believe him king, and their saviour. Help me.......give me answer....

Coming back to movie, what Nikhil has added, is ages old formula. Departed father [Roger Yuan-the only good act] and twin sisters - Deepika. [Yaaawn...]. Why can't we make an out and out action movie, or action comedy? do we require Drama side too??

I have never been a fan of Akki, so he started to disappointed me since the first scene itself. Overdone goofy, slapstick comedy. A very very desi attitude. This doesn't suits me at all. [I liked Namastey London a lot, cause he was balanced in it]. From Chandni chowk to China, he acts only like that. To thank God, last half an hour was little bearable cause he became serious then. Please Akki, dont do such lousy characters.

Being a Warner Bros. Movie, I was expecting some serious outing of China. Where in here, it looks like, China  country officials had given them a piece of 5 Square Kms. area to shoot for. So we are tired of seeing just one portion of the Great wall, and some lakes and hills around it. Rather than that, a small village set between two stone clad hills. So there is No China at all , in the movie named after it.

Movie contains subtitles for chinese dialogues. Fine. But why English subtitles for a hindi movie ? Can just anyone explain it to me??

Akshay is crying in 2 hours of the movie........please.

Now one can expect a lot from such movie, to be clean. Cause this is a Kung-fu comedy, so genuine laughs are always expected. While what we get here is - I beg your pardon,but - jokes about testicles are full on in this movie. Can we be more sophisticated dear Akki, or dear Nikhil?? Kids are biggest fan of yours. So be careful in future. I would like to praise Dostana here, cause being a movie on sexual subject [gays] - still they were quite in control when it came to dialogues. And here, even there is no need, these dialogues are sprinkled everywhere.

***spoiler, but not worth**
Even a disgusting scene, again seen on screen since 'Halla bol'. Where actor  does pee onscreen. Ajay did that on carpet in that movie. Now here, villain does the honour on Akki. Oh my god !! Am I watching a        C -grade - Bhojpuri movie???
***spoiler ends****

Deepika is a model in tele shopping products. So some ads are there. Which are hardly any funny, and trying so loudly to prove that they are funny. Similarly her track with reunion of father, is so bad writtten, i get headache whenever his dad had.

***spoiler, but not worth**
Deepika's dad is shown in memory loss. But he got me memory loss. Every time I thought-'oh finally, he remembers everything' - and each time he proved me wrong. His memory loss was so long, he got me into coma.
And a scene in first half, shows bad guys throwing small baby into valley from the wall. And when Daddy remembers it, the baby was safe in hands of bad guys.

Help me, who is Editor????
***spoiler, ends**

Songs are also a bit above average. Title song is bad. While S.I.D.H.U. impresses, solely because of Kailash's earthy voice. And winner was 'Tere Naina'. In this song, i was convinced with flying actors. [Rather then, flying Salman in Yuvvraaj]. Beautiful song, picturized well, but ooops,,,,so short. Only mukhda and that's all...........

Movie is good only in bits. Some funny scenes are really funny, like the one in plane, where Sidhu proves 'he is stupid'. And the other one, where Ranvir and Sidhu both dances to a very familier song to Akshay. Another scene got me some smile, was scene at visa consulate, where Deepika gets him some dance. Akshay was fantastic in all of these scenes.

Thankfully after two yawn hours, movie only peaks up in last half an hour, where real action is started. But then suddenly we get woken up, by the end. And that too, with an indication of ..........hold it...........a sequel.......................
Nahiinnnnnnnn...........................pehle Drona...aur ab yeh...................bachaoooo...

It was so much tiring rather then pleasing. So I felt like freed from a boring college lecture.

I din't expected my starting point for movie watching in  New Year-2009 like this. I was keen on watching some other movie, to start this year from. But I was not feeling much well, and time didn't allowed. So this movie, was my destiny. [I should have watched my pirated Slumdog, before going to this, atleast a great start to the new year]

7 comments:

  1. Thanks for your quick review, Darshit! I wanted this film to do well, and would have gone to see it if the reviews were good. But woah! I don't think I'll even watch this on DVD. I never got what the fuss was with Singh is Kinng, but at least it was entertaining in bits. This one seems to be a major disappointment.

    And this after I consider myself somewhat of an Akshay Kumar fan!

    Oh, and that first spoiler, so tasteless. It totally ruined an otherwise pretty good Halla Bol for me.

    LOL at the sequel comment. Seriously...

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  2. And, you are a quick responder, tBF :-D
    Thanks for going through this long post. But seriously I was so tired watching this movie, as i was in Drona and Hello. [they are set as benchmark, no? :-DD]

    I personally do not like Akki, in these kinda role. A desi guy, doing monkey-ish acts. So there..thats why i did liked his Namastey London, where he did become serious in most of the movie.

    That tasteless scene was...aaargghhhh...for me..

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  4. He is certainly capable of so much more. Oh my, Drona ki yaad mat dilaao bhai. :'(

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  5. Absolutely. There's no China at all in the film and to be honest even Chandni Chowk is missing. I'm including that in my review. Terrible film.

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  6. I could guess after watching the promos that this film won't do good. I agree with you here "...excess masala movie, one can not digest it,". As you said in 2nd comment, I too don't like Akshay in commercial films like this. He can do much better, if he selects a different genre.

    Oh, I am going to stay away from this. Instead, I'll watch Slumdog Crorepati, releasing next week. Cheers!

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  7. theBollywoodFan: Yes, Akki is capable of doing more. I liked his Aankhen earlier. And recent Namastey London. And - what ? Drona is indeed a benchmark of Bad filmmaking. So you have to see that comparison in future too... :-D LOL. just kidding..

    Bhargav: Oh yes, its a terrible piece of movie making. I don't know why they were claiming so much. I remember, Deepika saying 'I have done so much fight sequences'. What?!

    theBollywoodLover:Hummm....Akki can do different genres. I am eager to watch him in Nagesh Kukunoor's next. I wish it would be good if i had missed this one. Cause I needed a better start for the year 2009. :-(

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